Life By Days

CBS News Headline Fail

2010-08-23T18:50:00.001-04:00

I think perhaps you are confused about what a "diet" is, CBS News...

Not very convincing...

2010-08-11T18:14:00.000-04:00

You get why this is funny, right?

I don't know why

2010-08-10T16:25:00.001-04:00

So.

The garden.

I'm growing cucumbers. Don't ask me why. I don't know. It sounded cool to grow cucumbers. And actually cucumber plants are really fun.

(Amazingly, I don't have any good pictures of my cucumber plants. I don't know what happened. But trust me, they are very cute. And fun.)

But they make cucumbers. I can't remember the last time I ate cucumber. I know it was in a salad though. Probably at Outback Steakhouse and I haven't been there in years.

So all of this results in me having cucumbers that just sit on my counter. Sometimes I manage to give them away but I've already composted some of them. I know. It's terrible.

I've looked online for cucumber recipes, but most of them are some sort of creamy dill sauce cucumber dip thing. And I even made it once and took it to a party where no one, including me, ate any.

But then I remembered my roommate in college eating cucumbers. She sprinkled them with Lucas Limon salt and just ate them. Just like that.

Excuse me for a minute. I'm going to go see if I can find her on Facebook.

Nope. She's not there.

Anyway, thinking about her gave me an idea. I have lemon juice. I have lime. I have salt. Can I make my own Lucas and then eat cucumbers that way?

We'll see. I pulled seven cucumbers off the vine today. I sliced one up and put it on a place, I squeezed the lime on it. I splashed some lemon juice on it. Then I put the plate in the fridge, because it seems like this will taste better if the cukes are cold. Soon, I will take them out and sprinkle them with salt. And then I'll let you know.

UPDATE: Officially, it's awful. Don't try it. Dylan won't even eat it.

Motivation

2010-08-02T14:40:00.000-04:00

I'm thinking about creating my own motivational posters and hanging them in my house. Things I want to remind myself of frequently because I so easily forget.

Here are some examples:

Do new things.
Life is an emergency.
What are you afraid of?

Can you think of any? What would you like to remind yourself of?

Holy $h!t

2010-08-02T14:27:00.003-04:00

I few minutes ago, I posted this on Facebook.

Sometimes I forget that, at 32, I am no longer in danger of getting in trouble.

And then I sat there and stared at what I had just written. 32?! Are you kidding me?

How did I get here? When did I get here?

I thought I would feel different from this. I thought I would be different from this.

It's strange to me that age alone dictates adulthood. I think perhaps we should have to earn it, like take a test or something. Or like in GAs when I was a kid, where you have to memorize certain Bible verses and do certain activities and maybe sing a song or something to get your next badge.

The only thing I have done to deserve adulthood is that I kept waking up every day and suddenly I was older. (Notice I said "day" and not "morning" because sometimes it isn't still morning.)

But then I find things like this and this and this, and then I feel a little better, like maybe I'm not the only one.

Note: I found both of these entries while surfing the internet to avoid doing adult things that are weighing on me. Strange that the slacking off led to making me feel better. Justified? Let's say yes.

Eye wide shut

2010-07-30T23:52:00.001-04:00

It's weird having a pet with only one eye. It changes the things you say and they seem weird coming out of your mouth. For instance:

Autumn is in Jeff's lap and he's petting her. He wonders if she is still awake so he says, "Is her eye closed?"

Weird.

We're giving Autumn a bath. I say, "Don't get the shampoo in her eye."

Weird.

Again with the lap and the petting. Jeff says, "For a while she was asleep, but then she opened her eye."

Weird.

I gaze at her adoringly. "You have a pretty brown eye, Autumn."

Weird.

Best food in Italy

2010-07-29T16:20:00.000-04:00

Jeff and I were in Italy for 3 weeks. And I was planning on eating GOOD. I seriously love Italian food, and I planned on having it for every meal.

Turns out, Italian food in Italy is different from Italian food in the States. Shocking, I know.

But in Italy, a lot of their food has seafood in it. Weird, right? Italian food isn't supposed to have seafood in it.

And there were lots of olives. And mushrooms.

Also, sometimes the menus were only in Italian.

Jeff and I are not adventurous eaters, so to be safe, we ate a lot of pizza. Prosciutto pizza, because they didn't have pepperoni like you and I know pepperoni. And I didn't see any sort of alfredo anything the whole time I was there. There was even this one place that had a sign that said, "We don't have a tourist menu. We don't serve lasagna." What the heck?

So we didn't eat that great. Nothing really to write home about.

Except for that one place. Oh, my goodness, I want to go back to Venice so I can eat at that one place. It was a religious experience for me. So good.

If you are ever in Venice, you HAVE to go there. You must.

Wait - did I mention it was Chinese food?

It was totally Chinese food:

Tian Jin
Sestiere San Polo, 649
30125 Venezia, Italia

Avoidance is my MO

2010-07-28T00:43:00.003-04:00

Sometimes I think I'd have a better handle on my life if I just stopped avoiding things. It takes a lot of thought and energy to avoid things, and that's thought and energy I could be putting into addressing the whatever-it-is and then moving on to something actually productive.

Along those lines, I've been thinking about making a list of all the things I'm avoiding. Like pen and paper list. It seems like a good first step to dealing with something - actually admitting that there is a something and that I'm avoiding it. Acknowledge it. Get it out in the open.

Would you be surprised to learn I'm avoiding making that list?

That sorta reminds me:

The other day, my therapist told me that he thinks my transformation by God is more "Jacob wrestling with God" and less "road to Damascus."

So I'll try not to let myself get beat down that I am not the me I want to be quite yet.

Come to think of it, maybe that's why my hip has been popping so much lately, to remind me that struggling is succeeding and only quitting is losing.

Why does it have to be this way?

So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. When the man saw that he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob's hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. Then the man said, "Let me go, for it is daybreak."

But Jacob replied, "I will not let you go unless you bless me."

The man asked him, "What is your name?"

"Jacob," he answered.

Then the man said, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with men and have overcome."

Jacob said, "Please tell me your name."

But he replied, "Why do you ask my name?" Then he blessed him there.

So Jacob called the place Peniel,saying, "It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared."

TMI?

2010-07-27T14:14:00.000-04:00

Shortly after posting about my zucchini's, I fell ill. Aching, fever, congestion, etc. I'm FINALLY getting noticeably better and not a moment too soon because the more I cough, the more the integrity of my bladder control muscles diminishes.

A story of life, love, sickness, murder, death and new life

2010-07-15T19:23:00.005-04:00

Last year, I tried growing food for the first time. I went to Target and looked in the $1 aisle right at the front of the store and they had these strawberry and tomato grow kits. There were seeds, dirt pellets and tiny little pots to start your plants in. Here is where I talked about my adventures last year.

This year, though, this year is different. We have an urban farm team at our church and they had seed starter kits and leftover seeds that they were just giving away. So I totally took some. I am growing zucchini, cucumbers, tomatoes, sweet peppers, oregano and basil. Below, you will find a zucchini-filled story of love, heartache and hope.

Here are my zukes nine days after being planted. If you have ever used a seed starter kit before, you can probably tell I am a beginner. Even though the kit had dirt pellets, I thought I was supposed to add more. So I did. Turns out I didn't need to do that, but it didn't hurt anything. I just wasted some of my dirt. But that's not the point of the photo. The point is: Look! A lil tiny baby zucchini plant! Yay!

Here they are at 15 days. You can't know how proud I was of these little guys. And I can't tell you how much time I spent just staring at them, because I don't know. A lot.

Day 25. They are so big. I am so proud. At this point, I have NO IDEA that these little guys aren't very big at all. This ain't nuthin'.

I moved them to the yard on day 39. They are looking sorta sad. I waited too long to move them. I was so afraid they would die. That my love for them would go unfulfilled. That I would have my heartbroken. And that they would die because of my ignorance and negligence.

But they didn't die. They were just fine. And they grew! Here they are at day 58!

They are as big as Autumn!

Look at that! It's a flower! Yay! My first blooming male flower, on day 60.

Hello, little man.

Here are two flowers, one male and one female, getting ready to bloom on day 66. The male flower is the one with the long, skinny stem and the female flower has the shorter, fatter stem. That short and fat stem is really a baby zucchini! Once the flower gets fertilized, the stem will grow into a big zucchini!

Day 69. How appropriate. Today is the day this little guy finds love.

He's gonna make a baby with this fine lady.

With zukes, size DOES matter. Here's a big ol' girl flower next to a little boy flower. But it's okay, he's got what it takes.

Basically, I don't trust nature. So rather than let the bees take care of this particular episode of "The Birds and The Bees," I take matters into my own hands. Here I am collecting the male sample.

See?

And here I am depositing them in the girl flower. In case you were wondering, this sort of artificial insemination is not messy and does not require the use of gloves. I did feel a little dirty, though.

Wow! You guys are getting really big. I had no idea. My zukes at day 71.

Well what do we have here? A zucchini! Are you ready to get picked?

Almost 8 inches. Perfect.

Come here, you.

Yes, I think you'll do nicely.

Homegrown zucchini, all sliced up.

Into the skillet with some olive oil.

Add some chicken and spaghetti sauce.

Served with homemade pasta and Parmesan cheese.

This is my second zucchini. Do you see how little it is at the left end? That's because it was only partially fertilized. That's what I get for letting nature take it's course.

But I just cut off the little end and used the rest of this very large zuke.

I shredded my zucchini. And shredded and shredded. And took a break and shredded some more.

And got two cups of zucchini from it.

I made two loaves of zucchini bread with this, but I didn't get any pictures before it all got eaten. Sorry. You'll just have to use your imagination.

One day, I went outside and my plants looked like this. I thought they just weren't getting enough water since it hadn't rained in a while, so I watered and watered them. And I noticed that at night, they perked back up and looked just fine. That made me feel a little better.

But then I noticed that the stems looked like this. Sorta mushy and rotten. That couldn't be good. So I did some research and found out about the squash vine borer moth. From hell.

I ripped open one of the plants.

There it is. The squash vine borer larva. (click to enlarge, if you wanna, but you may not)

You are evil and you must be destroyed.

Yes, you.

Even though I had mixed feelings about killing all those slugs, I felt no mercy or remorse about killing these evil things. Actually, I felt a little better doing it. With a few of them, I used a small rock and squished them. But then I got grossed out when I could feel their squishy bodies giving way under the pressure of the rock. With others, I just dropped a brick on them. That worked just as well.

I didn't kill all of them. At least not directly. But I did pull up all the plants and put them in garbage bags and put them out with the trash. I was mad. And I was sad.

But I didn't give up! The next day, I planted new zucchini seeds. Here they are, at day 6.

Look at those roots! All the way to the bottom of the cup! Already!

These guys are awesome. They are gonna make it. I just know it.

Fingers Crossed

2010-05-27T18:10:00.000-04:00

All of my Italy pictures are on my laptop.

My laptop won't turn on.

I think my brother can get all the pics off, which is good, because in addition to Italy pictures, I have 4 years worth of pictures on that computer. I'd be sad if they were all gone.

But, at the very least, all the Italy pics are still on my camera, so if I have to download them somewhere else, I can.

But I'd rather not. I'd rather get the laptop fixed.

I am a slug murderer

2010-05-17T22:41:00.000-04:00

I don't feel good about it. Really. In fact, last night, I even cried a little. I don't like killing things.

But I'm trying to grow food. That I will eat. Me. And Jeff. Not them. I am not growing slug food. So when I see them, I gotta kill them.

This year, I have only killed one in the slug bath of death (beer.) I went out during the night once to take a peek and I saw two slugs on the edge, getting a nice good taste of the Corona, but in the morning, they were gone.

I did some research about how to kill slugs. One website said just poke'em with a stick. Just skewer them. Slug-kabobs. And I'm sorry, but I can't do that.

I also read that you can sprinkle oat bran in the slug area and the slugs will eat the oat bran and then die. Sorta like birds eating rice, except I'm not sure that one is true. I tried this and sure enough, the slugs sure did eat the oat bran, but I don't know if they died or not. I mean, I don't think they swallow and then immediately keel over dead. So maybe they died later. I don't know.

But I do know that ants sure like oat bran, too. Because over the next few days, they sure walked off with a lot of it.

You know who else likes oat bran? Birds. Birds like oat bran. I'm not sure how they found it. Did they smell it? Did they see it from the air? Did one bird find it and then go tell all his friends? I don't know. But I sure enjoyed watching the birds come visit my yard.

So my killing method of choice has been salt. And believe me, it's not fun. When you sprinkle salt on a slug, it shrivels up and writhes, as if in pain. It's really hard to watch. But I make myself watch. I don't let myself look away and ignore it and pretend it didn't happen. I don't like killing them. But I'm doing it so I can provide local, organic, healthy food for myself and my husband.

I hope God forgives me.

Because let me tell you something, I sure have killed some slugs.

Last week, I killed seven. Six with salt and one with beer. Saturday night, I killed 20. Last night, 12. Tonight, 19. For a grand total of 58.

58 dead animals. Because of me.

Tonight, I got three of them as they were feasting on the corpse of a slug that got killed yesterday. As far as I'm concerned, if they're gonna eat a brother's corpse, they deserve to die.

My next concern: how badly am I screwing up the soil by pouring all this salt on it?

Finally!

2010-05-17T17:21:00.001-04:00

We got to Venice. I loved Venice. As soon as we got there, I loved it. I wanted to live in Venice. I wanted to sleep in Venice. I wanted to eat in Venice. I wanted to fight in Venice.

I wanted to marry Venice.

I can't really tell you what was so great about it. But I'll try.

First of all, Venice is an island. Well, really it's lots of islands. Look here. You'll see that there are the islands of Murano, San Michele, and Lido close by, but Venice itself is also made up of more than one island. First of all, the Grand Canal separates the island into two distinct land masses, but if you zoom in, you'll see that there are a bunch of smaller canals that effectively create even small islands.

Cars are not allowed in Venice. In fact, neither are bicycles or skateboards. Everybody walks in Venice. Which is pretty cool. There's just a whole separate vibe to the place. However, that means that getting anything to Venice is a big freaking deal. Everything is brought in on the water and then walked to wherever it needs to be. So if you own a store in Venice, all of your merchandise is hand trucked to your store. And imagine if you're doing construction on something or you just bought a couch or a bed. Only the smaller boats (that can't hold a couch or a bed) go down the smaller canals, so it's very likely that your couch or bed is going to have to go for a long walk, over small canals, which means bridges, which means stairs, before it gets to your house. It's a very labor intensive city.

Because there are no cars in Venice, there aren't really any roads either. I mean, I guess you could call them streets, but really they are just glorified sidewalks. Everywhere. And you don't really name sidewalks, do you? Some of the more major walkways are named, which helps when you are trying to get somewhere using a map, but not all of them are. And some of the walkways are very wide and others are very narrow. And some of the walkways seem like they go somewhere, but really, they just dead end into the water. Or they dead end into a courtyard or around the corner, or they go around the corner and THEN dead end into the water.

Rick Steves says that you should just go get lost in Venice and see what you find. Which is good advice. Except that you can't really help it. You'll get lost in Venice.

But don't worry. You'll be glad you did. Because it means that around any corner or down any street no matter how small, you might find some really cool store with all kinds of interesting things inside.

I have lots and lots of pictures of Venice.

The first picture of Venice! Woo!

Yup. I'm really there.

Some tourists going for a ride on a gondola.

One of the smaller canals.

Walkway by the water.

Wide walkway.

Narrow walkway.

Narrow walkway with some perspective.

Going over a canal. (Graffiti is everywhere in Italy. Venice was no exception.)

There were lots of masks in Venice.

Really. A lot.

I'm not even kidding.

I'm laughing and crying

2010-05-17T16:17:00.000-04:00

On Facebook today, I sent friend requests to a couple of teachers I had in high school. It's amazing how many names I can't remember. I remember being in high school and thinking about how there was no way I'd ever forget anyone's name. I knew them all too well. I'd spent too much time with them. And I'd never forget their names. Not in an "I promise I'll never forget you" sort of way. It was just that my brain retained information. And so I would never forget.

Fast forward some number of years and here we are. Many names, forgotten.

However, even though I've forgotten names I thought I wouldn't, there are some things I wish I could have forgotten and did not.

For example:

At the end of my senior year, I bought a few cards to give to some of my teachers. My favorites. Whose names I have NOT forgotten. I remember giving one card to Coach Bucholtz at the senior assembly. I remember him opening the card and reading it. And I remember him acting a little weird. Like he sorta smiled but didn't laugh. Mostly he seemed confused and uncomfortable. I remember being a little disappointed that he hadn't like my card. I didn't understand. And it was the last time I ever saw him, so I was/am a little sad that our last interaction was awkward.

Later, looking back, I realize that perhaps the card was a little, uh, inappropriate.

It went something like this:

Front of card:
It's weird how when you take your hat off, you can still feel it on your head.

Inside card:
It's not that way with underwear though.

Yes, that's right. I gave a card to a male teacher that talks about taking underwear off. The 18-year-old me gets an F for discretion.

Jeff - and what appears to be a pigeon

2010-05-14T00:09:00.000-04:00

In front of Pitti Palace...

The original

2010-05-13T23:45:00.000-04:00

Here is the original "Jeff likes to take unflattering pictures of his wife" picture.

We were in Washington for Obama's inauguration. It was SUPER cold (actually only in the 30s, but we were outside in it all day) and we found this grate and warm air was coming up from the grate and it felt WONderful, so I sat down and asked Jeff to take my picture and this is what I ended up with.

Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.

Quack quack

2010-05-13T23:32:00.000-04:00

I'm really sad I didn't get the entire thing in the shot. The first frame is just like the second frame except he's asking the duck, "Parla Italiano?"

I laughed and laughed.

Actually, the wine bottles are also very small

2010-05-13T23:24:00.000-04:00

At least this one was.

The trucks are small too

2010-05-13T23:22:00.000-04:00

This one only has 3 wheels.

The duomo in Florence

2010-05-13T23:19:00.000-04:00

The duomo...

...in Florence...

...was really...

...beautiful.

Driving in Italy

2010-05-13T23:11:00.000-04:00

I'm sure glad we didn't do it.

In case you were wondering

2010-05-11T16:13:00.002-04:00

There is no Starbucks in Florence.

I asked.

Everything is smaller in Europe

2010-05-11T00:10:00.001-04:00

The cars in Italy are small.

Very small.

Very, very small.

Our hotel in Rome

2010-05-10T23:15:00.000-04:00

Here are some pictures of our room in Rome. Not sure why I took so many pictures of the bathroom.

There was a clothes line in the shower. Here, I am demonstrating its use.

The shower only had one door. Not sure why. Water got everywhere.

There was a telephone in the bathroom. For emergencies? Also, every room we stayed in had a bidet. I'm not really sure what a bidet is used for. But apparently they are very important. The presence of the bidet led me to believe that the Italians are very serious about hygiene, which I assumed meant they were serious about the cleanliness of their bathrooms, even the public bathrooms. Be warned: this is not the case.

So here are the blinds. It looks like plenty of light is coming through, right? But these are mechanical blinds. And when you close them, they are very, very closed.

Instead of windows, these were actually doors. You opened them...

...and then opened the mechanical blinds...

...and opened them some more to reveal the lovely little balcony!

With a lovely little view.

Hey! That's ITALY out there! Sweet!

I will NOT eat McDonald's in Rome!

2010-05-10T22:24:00.000-04:00

I am 12

2010-05-10T01:25:00.000-04:00

Talk about unflattering photos. Take a look at this guy.

Trevi fountain

2010-05-10T01:20:00.002-04:00

Let's start with the second photo in the series "Jeff likes to take unflattering pictures of his wife."

(Why do I keep posting them on the internet?)

I'm sorry. I'd really like to talk about this fountain and how great it is. The sculptures, the water. But I look like a complete doof.

Fine. I just won't smile. Is that better?

Oy vey.

Let's look at a better picture, shall we?

Seriously, this is one of the coolest fountains I saw in Italy. And one of the most crowded. "The fountain at the junction of three roads marks the terminal point of the "modern" Acqua Vergine, the revived Aqua Virgo, one of the ancient aqueducts that supplied water to ancient Rome. In 19 BC, supposedly with the help of a virgin, Roman technicians located a source of pure water some 13 km (8 miles) from the city. (This scene is presented on the present fountain's façade.) However, the eventual indirect route of the aqueduct made its length some 22 km (14 miles). This Aqua Virgo led the water into the Baths of Agrippa. It served Rome for more than four hundred years.*"

* Quote from Wikipedia site

What a great name for a store

2010-05-10T01:08:00.000-04:00

One last thing

2010-05-10T01:01:00.001-04:00

Click the photos to see them larger. They look way better that way.

Seriously.

Gelato!

2010-05-10T00:58:00.001-04:00

I ate a lot of gelato in Italy. Gelato is basically Italian ice cream. But it's different. And the Italians eat a lot of it. It was so funny to see two business men in suits, standing around on a fairly chilly day eating ice cream cones. But that's what you do in Italy - you go to a gelateria and get some gelato.

Gelato comes in lots of different flavors. My favorite was chocolate. Sorry. I tried lots of other flavors. But chocolate was my favorite. Although sometimes I could get two scoops and get one chocolate and one hazelnut. Yum!

Anyway, here I am eating my first gelato.

I wanted to get a good picture of me eating gelato.

So Jeff took several.

Surely, one of them will turn out.

Right?

Really, Rome was sort of a blur

2010-05-10T00:44:00.000-04:00

The problem was that we had just had a long flight, an even longer sleep, we couldn't read the signs and everyone was speaking another language and we knew nothing. And we were wide-eyed and confused for about 48 hours. So I don't remember a whole lot.

But anyway, Rome has these ruins, right? I think maybe there was a sign somewhere telling what this was or at least what they think it was. But I don't remember. But the cool part is, OMG! These are ancient Roman ruins! How cool is that!

This dude was wearing some yellow pants. Yeah...

Here's a fountain in front of the Pantheon. Not to be confused with the Parthenon. (Actually, to be fair, it's very easy to get them confused. Why else would I have done it so many times?)

There are a lot of street performers in Italy, especially Rome. Some are living statues, others are magicians. This guy was a funny clothes wearer. Oh, also an actor.

Sassy me in front of the Pantheon.

And stop goofing around on the internet

2010-05-07T12:09:00.001-04:00

Jeff and I are having friends over for dinner tonight. They arrive in less than six hours. And our dining room looks like this.

And this.

And the rug in the living room looks like this.

I better get to work.

I painted my kitchen

2010-05-07T00:34:00.000-04:00

I didn't take any "before" pictures. I should have. But here are the after shots.

Eventually, a pot rack will go on this wall. Some day. Hopefully.

Haha. I just noticed the shadow from the ladder in the other room.

The chalk board thing is a wall sticker we got from Target.

The two colors: Flamenco Pink and Peach Taffy,

which are Valspar colors, but we got Benjamin Moore paint.

Being unemployed doesn't pay well, but it sure has it's perks.

Like having the time and motivation to get house projects done. Dude. Totally.

Picture perfect

2010-05-06T22:44:00.000-04:00

Don't worry

2010-05-06T22:39:00.000-04:00

I'm not through posting about Italy, but I'm going to have to intersperse some current day posts too. Mostly pictures. And they won't all be nude dog photos.

Autumn poses for Playboy

2010-05-06T22:35:00.001-04:00

Roman soldiers and other stuff

2010-04-21T00:37:00.000-04:00

What's so crazy about Rome is that it's this modern city with a bunch of really old stuff mixed in. And I mean really old. I remember when I moved to Philadelphia from Dallas, I was enchanted with how much history there was everywhere. Well Philly ain't got nuthin' on Rome!

Another thing about Rome is that they are still discovering things. They are still excavating. But it's not this precious little archeological site. It's a city. Where people still live and work and drive cars and ride the subway. And you just walk around and suddenly you see 2,000-year-old pillars just standing around.

And American dudes drinking water.

And really intricate carvings in the side of a... something. I don't remember.

And then there's this fantastic building. With these trees that just look awesome.

The building is called Palazzo Venezia. You can read about it here. (You'll need to scroll down a bit. Also, the picture at the top of the page shows the fountain I was standing in front of in this post.)

Oh, look, another beautiful tree. Wait. What is THAT?

It's a Roman soldier! Waiting to have a picture taken with you for a small fee.

No thanks. I'll just stand over here and take a picture for free.

Honestly, I don't know what this is

2010-04-20T23:58:00.000-04:00

All I know is it's a fountain IN ROME. Cuz that's how I felt at the moment. We FINALLY got out and about to actually do some sightseeing, and there was this amazing fountain, and I wanted pictures. Of me. In Rome.

Jeff was quite the artist that day.

Jeff also likes to take pictures of me when I'm not ready.

Hello, Italian fountain. It's good to see you.

The sad news is that I lost this awesome jacket on the trip. I know, it's terrible. This is my orange corduroy jacket that I got for $5 at the Penn Move Out Sale last May. I love this jacket. Most pictures of me in Italy show me wearing this jacket. And I lost it. In Atlanta. On the way home. (sob)

Day 1

2010-04-18T23:11:00.000-04:00

We landed in Rome at 7:30 a.m. local time, 2:30 a.m. Eastern. We slept a little on the plane and hoped to get in a full day of Rome.

However, by the time we got our luggage, got to the train station, bought tickets, waited for the train, rode the train, found the Metro, bought tickets for the Metro, bought a map, found out which bus would take us to our hotel, rode the Metro, found the bus stop, realized our bus wasn't running, found a bus that took us close, rode the bus, got off at the wrong stop, asked two women who "non parlo inglese" for directions, broke the wheels on our luggage and just dragged them on the ground, left Jeff standing on the corner with our broken luggage while I went off alone, found the hotel, asked them to use their shuttle to go find Jeff, gave the non-english speaking driver directions using grunts and pointing, picked up Jeff, got back to the hotel and checked in, it was already 12:30 and we were beat.

I had been warned not to go to bed until bedtime. Sternly warned. That it was a bad idea. But I was so tired. So I laid down. Jeff joined me.

We woke at at 9:30 p.m. Crap! Luckily, we still had time to go grab dinner at the hotel restaurant. Spaghetti alla carbonara. Super good. Then we went back to the room, made notes about the day in our journals, and, surprisingly, managed to go back to sleep.

One important note: Neither of us has a watch. So the only way we knew the time was by looking at our phones that were still on eastern time and adding 5 hours. (Not a single room in all of the rooms we stayed in had a clock.)

I woke up some time later with a backache. I couldn't see any light coming through the blinds, so I assumed it was still night and not time to get up. I got up to use the restroom and check the time. My phone said it was 8:35. Which meant 1:35 local time.

I was so sad. I felt like my body was done sleeping, and the bed was making my back hurt, and I was bored. Jeff was awake by this point too. Then he suggested that perhaps our phones had found a local signal and had adjusted to Roman time, which meant it was actually after 8:30 local time.

Maybe that's it! Jeff got up and opened the blinds and daylight came pouring in. Yay! It's daytime! Time to get up!

So we got up and started getting ready. Ready to hit the town, well rested and ready to sight see! Woo!

Then Jeff had another thought: What if our phones DIDN'T pick up a local signal. What if it was in fact now almost 2. In the afternoon.

No way. Nuh-uh.

Just then, the cleaning lady knocked on the door. I told her we needed dieci minuti (10 minutes) and asked her the time. She showed me her watch. 2:05.

Dang it! That means we slept almost 9 hours, were awake for about 3 hours and then slept another 13 hours. And that a day and a half of our 2 and half days in Rome were gone.

Well, let's stop wasting time. Let's go see Rome.

The flight

2010-04-12T12:34:00.002-04:00

I'd like to start off with this, the first of a series of photos called "Jeff likes to take unflattering pictures of his wife."

We are at the airport in New York, and boarding has just begun for our flight. While were waiting for them to call our zone, I decided to test out my new neck pillow. It's inflatable and pink and wonderful.

And I look like a goober. But at least the pillow matches my hair!

A few minutes later, we were on a very big plane ready to take a very long flight. Flights like these just feel different. There is a different energy. On domestic flights, no one seems excited. Everyone just plays it cool, like they fly all the time, and no one ever seems as scared as I feel (I hate flying) and we all just file down the aisle, sit in our seats, plug in our headphones and pretend to sleep.

Totally different on this flight. There was excitement! People were talking, and everybody was super friendly, and there was just this buzzing energy, as if we all knew we were about to go on an amazing journey. Fun!

And then, you know, we flew. Not that exciting. We watched some movies and ate some bad plane food and got some bad plane sleep.

Two interesting things:

1. On our way to Rome, we only flew over one other country - France. I don't know why, but I didn't think you could get from NYC to Rome and only fly over France. Turns out, you can. I just don't know my European geography very well.

2. The island of Corsica looks AMAZING from the air. It's basically an island of mountains, the highest of which is over 8,800 feet, and it's so amazing to see the mountains so close to the ocean. Unfortunately, I didn't take a picture.

But don't worry. I took over 500 pictures on the trip. There will be plenty to see.

Where to start

2010-04-10T10:54:00.003-04:00

I thought about starting with the good stuff. You know, Italy. But this whole going to Italy thing was quite a journey for me, so I think I'd rather start sooner than that.

Therefore, I will start with Tuesday, March 16th.

Laundry is done, passports located, last minute to-do list made. Only one more day to get it all done.

Around four in the morning, I woke up to hear Jeff mumbling. (I learned later he was saying, "No, no, no.") And he restless, sort of rocking side to side. I asked if he was okay and he said, "No. I think I'm going to throw up."

Crap. Are you kidding me? I've known you for 3 1/2 years and you have not thrown up a single time. And now here we are, 36 hours before our flight leaves for Italy and you need to throw up?!

I didn't say that. But I thought it.

And I also thought:
What does he have?
Will I catch it?
How long will it last?
Is it contagious?
Should we still go?

Luckily, the puking stopped by noon and in the meantime, we determined that he had food poisoning. Arby's. And when he was saying, "No, no, no," it was because he kept falling asleep and dreaming of food which made him even more nauseous.

But even though the puking had stopped, he still felt bad and was very weak. He was too weak to even pack. Instead, he laid in the bed and I held up every shirt he owned for him to say yes or no. And then I packed for the both of us.

Also, in the midst of all this, I needed to buy some euros. I searched on the internet to figure out where the best place in Philly was and I ended up here. The process itself was pretty painless, except for the fact that they would only take cash for euros (couldn't use my debit card) and when I tried to take $500 in cash out at the ATM, my bank said, "Whoa, there, lil' missy. You don't normally take out cash from ATMs. And you never take out that much at once. Is that really you?" So they put a hold on my card and I had to call them and verify the last three transactions and then wait for them to release the hold. It wasn't a huge hassle, but it took longer than I wanted it to.

After that, there was a little shopping to do, and then I spent the evening wandering around the house trying to see if there was anything else I needed to pack or to do or to stress out about.

At an internet cafe in Roma

2010-03-20T06:52:00.000-04:00

Due to technical difficulties, I have not been able to post to my blog from my regular computer, which is where I have been typing and downloading pictures. I will try to get that worked out. In the meantime, we found an internet cafe.

I just want to say that keyboards are different in Rome. I can not find the apostrophe, which is why I am not using any contractions.

I will take a picture and show you later.

But we are here and safe and having a great time.

Also, I ate gelato on the steps of a fountain in front of the pantheon today. Totally cool.

Ciao.

How I ended up in Italy

2010-03-18T09:00:00.001-04:00

Disclaimer: This is not a "how to plan a trip to Italy" post. This is a "how I planned a trip to Italy" post. It's not the only or best way. But it got the job done.

1. I decided I wanted to go to Italy. That part was easy. Did that years ago.
2. In June '09, Jeff and I decided we'd go in Spring 2010. And we started saving money right away.
3. I talked about going to Italy for months and months. Told everyone we were going to Italy in the Spring.
4. Started worrying that I was talking about going to Italy, but not actually planning.
5. I quit my job. Well, I gave notice anyway, but kept working.
6. Finally, in January, I started looking at plane tickets. I think I looked at travelocity and expedia. I looked around at different prices and dates, etc. And I just looked.
7. I talked with Jeff about what I found about plane tickets. Decided we would go for three weeks. Mostly because we knew there was a lot we'd want to see and we figured it was cheaper to stay longer and see more than to have to go back some other time. (Even though I HOPE we still go back some other time.) And if being gone that long made things difficult when it came to finding a new job, well, we'd just have to work it out.
8. I bought plane tickets. (I think it's important to just look around for a while and see what's out there. And then buy later. At least it was for me.)
9. Picked which cities we wanted to go to. Here are the cities I picked and the reasons I picked them:

Rome - Duh. Of course you go to Rome.
Florence - Sandra Bullock's character from While You Were Sleeping wanted to go to Florence.
Venice - I hear it's cool.
Milan - I don't know... I hear there's a fashion show? That we won't go to?
Turin - The Shroud.
Cinque Terre - click here. You'll understand.
Pisa - The leaning tower.
Rome again - our flight leaves from Rome.

10. Talked more about going to Italy.
11. Decided which nights would be spent where. We decided two in Rome, three in Florence, two in Venice (because Elizabeth Gilbert said in her book Eat, Pray, Love that she didn't like Venice that much,) three in Milan, two in Turin, five in Cinque Terre, one in Pisa and two in Rome.
12. Made sure there were trains that would take us from city to city. Tried to understand the rail system. Failed. Hoped that it would work out anyway.
13. Stressed more about not planning more. Specifically, I worried that the longer I waited, the more expensive the rooms would be.
14. Started looking at rooms. Planned out where we'd stay and how much it would cost.
15. Waited several weeks. Tried to books rooms. Discovered they were no longer available. Started over.
16. Searched kayak.com for rooms. Spent HOURS looking for rooms. Seriously, I probably spent an hour and a half on rooms for each city. And we were staying in 7 cities. Looked at pictures. Read reviews. Looked at maps. Looked at how close they were to train stations. Was breakfast included?
17. Finally started booking rooms.
18. Created spreadsheet. Spreadsheet contains info like: date, city, hotel, address, check in time, check out time, breakfast included?, cost, etc.
19. Printed mini maps from Google maps.
20. Did laundry.
21. Packed.
22. Got on a plane.

It's that easy!

Last minute

2010-03-17T08:15:00.001-04:00

Turns out, I don't know how much shampoo two people use in three weeks. It never seemed important before.

Also, I wanted to sleep a little later, but I'm too anxious. Which isn't the same thing as excited.

Leaving on a jet plane

2010-03-15T23:51:00.002-04:00

In 48 hours, Jeff and I will be 6 hours into our 9 hour flight from NYC to Rome.

Holy cow. I've always wanted to go to Italy. Always. Since forever. And it always seemed so unattainable. I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to save the money and go. And even if I did save the money, holy cow, how do you plan a trip to Europe? I mean, where do you even start? How do you know what cities you want to go to and how many nights you want to stay, etc?

It might not seem that hard, but planning doesn't come easily to me at all. (In fact, if it hadn't been for my mom, Jeff and I might have gotten married at the JP.) So for me, planning this trip has been a little daunting.

But I did it. I'll write another post about it, for anyone else in the world who might not know even where to start. I mean, you know, I assume Jeff and I aren't the only ones. Right?

I plan on taking my computer and blogging while we are gone. I'll post some pics and talk about where we go and what we see and, most importantly, WHAT WE EAT.

So maybe you'll want to come along for the ride?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/travellingtamas/ / CC BY 2.0

Snowmageddon Part 2

2010-02-11T15:19:00.002-05:00

Warning - this is a very picture heavy post.

This was Wednesday during the day. You can see where the sidewalk got shoveled after the last snow, but you can also see it's starting to get covered up again. Anyway, the first few pics are of my car as the storm and clean-up progressed.

This was Wednesday night.

Thursday morning

Thursday after the first major attempt at digging out. (The second attempt hasn't occurred yet. And perhaps I'm being optimistic in assuming that it will.)

Here's my car from another angle - Wednesday night.

After phase one of the dig out on Thursday morning.

Our sidewalk again - Wednesday night

Our sidewalk - Thursday morning

The short-legged blurry monster in the backyard.

The dogs made a little jug handle they could use for turning around and coming back to the door. The snow is higher than Dylan, but also, he hasn't sunk all the way to the ground because the snow is packed down. There are several inches of snow beneath him.

This doesn't look that impressive until you realize that his back feet are on the second step. You can't see the bottom step and you can't see the ground.

Here's an icicle hanging off our house.

Here's a GIANT icicle hanging off the neighbors house.

(click to enlarge)

Parking is a big deal in Philly. When it snows and you dig your car out, it's TOTALLY UNCOOL if someone comes along and parks in your spot while you are gone. So it's kind of understood that you only park in spots that you dug out. But that's doesn't keep people from being protective of their spots. So lots of people put chairs in their spots while they are gone. This neighbor put a chair in their spot after digging out after last weekend's storm. And now they have a big snowy chair.

This is just to give an idea of how deep you have to dig down to get to the sidewalk. And yes, you really do need to shovel your sidewalks. There's a lot of pedestrian traffic in Philly, so sidewalks gets used a lot. And there's always the fear that someone will fall on your sidewalk because you didn't shovel it and then sue you. I haven't heard of it happening, but everyone seems to be afraid of it.

Sure was a beautiful sky.

Snowmageddon Part 1

2010-02-10T17:08:00.000-05:00

These are a few days late, but here are some pictures from last Saturday's snow storm.

For this picture, I was standing in our backyard looking into my neighbor's yard.

My neighbor's table gives you a pretty good idea of how deep the snow was.

The wind was pretty crazy in that storm. This is the snow formation that the wind created on the back of Jeff's car.

Stay tuned. I'll have some more pics of today's storm soon.

The Aughts

2009-12-30T14:26:00.000-05:00

I knew that New Year's Day was coming. That it was almost 2010. But I only recently realized that this is the start of a new decade as well (even though technically, it isn't, but who cares?)

So then I had to be like everyone else and look back over the past 10 years, and think about what I was doing 10 years ago and all the things that have happened in the mean time.

It's strange to me how one day can seem so insignificant and even a month can go by and nothing seems different, and then all of a sudden, it's 10 years later and my life has changed.

Ten years ago, I could never have imagined today. What am I doing here? How did I get here? This isn't what I thought it would be.

Makes me a little leery of the '10s. What will happen to me then?

Here’s to you, 32

2009-11-20T12:32:00.001-05:00

Today is my birthday. 12 hours and 32 minutes in, it has already been a good one.

Last night as we were lying in bed, I asked Jeff to sing to me, which is one of my favorite things in the world. At first, he didn’t know what to sing so I suggested he sing a Christmas Carol and so he sang “Silent Night.”

As I was lying there, I told myself, “Remember this moment. The sound of his deep voice. Lying in the warm bed. His cold feet against my leg. The sound of the rain outside. Remember this.”

Then after “Silent Night,” he sang “Both of Us’ll Feel the Blast” by Waterdeep. Here are the lyrics.

We’re both dirty, baby – that’s just the way it goes
We’ll try to cut the fuses off before everything blows
And if it blows and both of us are standing real close by
Then both of us’ll feel the blast and both of us’ll die
But dying’s overrated, it’s a ticket on a train
And as long as I can hold your hand, I’ll know that I’m still sane
Maybe I’m an idiot for thinking that it’s true
But I believe that Jesus knew what He was doing when He gave me you

Lately I’ve been wondering – what are we gonna do
When we wake up in the morning and it’s just me and you?
Cause we ain’t never done this thing but I guess that’s how it goes
You breathe deep as it comes to you and hold tight when it blows
And if it blows and both of us are standing real close by
Then both of us’ll feel the blast and both of us’ll die
And dying’s underrated, it’s a ticket to the feast –
The one we’re all invited to, from the greatest to the least

I hope we sit together when Jesus serves the wine
So I can look into your eyes when I taste it the first time
And I know that there’s no secrets when you’re sitting at the table
But I believe we’ll smile real knowingly when we read the label
And it says “passion sacrificed to keep from going crazy.”
We’ll tip our glasses to the Host who used to look so hazy
And drink it down all sweet and slow and slip inside His mind
And realize as it goes down – this is communion wine

It’d be safe to say I cried. But it was a good cry.

I don't know what I'm doing

2009-11-11T16:46:00.003-05:00

One of the things I am looking forward to about quitting my job is not being such a complainer. I don't think I am a complainer by nature. I think I am pretty positive and upbeat.

But then I moved here and I was struggling with the transition and I wanted to make more friends, but I realized that all I ever talked about was how miserable I was. Doesn't that make you want to be friends with me?!

So it was sort of a catch-22: I really was having a hard time and what I needed most was to talk about it because it helped me process things. But it was sort of off-putting. Ya know?

Luckily, a lot of that is over with. Believe me, I am way more glad than you are. Haha!

The last big thing was my job. Because, you know, that's what people talk about. When you're trying to make conversation with someone you don't know very well, you ask about their job. And I have had lots of conversations that went something like this:

You: So how's work going?
Me: I don't really like it.
You: What don't you like about it?
Me: It's just not me.
You: What kind of job do you think you want?
Me: That's part of the problem. I don't know. If I knew, I'd go do that instead.
You: What industry do you want to work in?
Me: I don't care what industry.
You: What company do you want to work for?
Me: I don't care about that either. It just depends on what I do there.
You: So what do you want to do?
Me: I don't know.

And you know what? I still don't have a lot of those answers. But it's time to start complaining about it and just start doing something.

And it feels pretty good.

Now conversations go like this:
You: So did you really quit?
Me: Yup! Yay!
You: What are you going to do now?
Me: I don't know! Isn't that great?! Haha!
You: What kind of job are you looking for?
Me: I'm not. I'm not going to work for a little while.
You: That sounds awesome.

Yeah. It does.

2009-11-06T17:40:00.003-05:00

I used to never listen to NPR. It wasn't some passive "I just never end up on that station" sort of thing either. I tried to listen. People kept beginning too many stories with "So I was listening to NPR and..." and I wanted to be a part of it!

But it was the voices, the voices! I just couldn't stand to listen to their voices. That quasi midwestern flat but also slightly arrogantly educated and enlightened accent was too much! I couldn't take it.

And now? I don't know what has happened to me. I'm a little sad that Philadelphia has changed me in so many ways. But like I tweeted once, if you live in Philly for an extended period of time you will either be miserable or be changed. I went with the option that involved fewer nights sitting in the closet feeling crazy.

So sometimes I listen to NPR.

Anyway, the other day, they were featuring some folksy singer and the lyrics to one of the songs went something like: I laughed twice as hard as I cried.

I thought, "Wow! What a great way to live your life! I mean, you know, there's tears and stuff, but if in the end, you have laughed twice as hard as you have cried, then I bet that's a pretty good life!"

But then I started thinking about how hard I've cried, and how annoying I can be when I'm in a fanTAStic mood and laughing and being silly, and I thought that just might lead to more tears.

So I'm not sure what I think of this.

Can you tell I'm stewing?

Re-energized

2009-11-04T16:50:00.003-05:00

It's amazing how much better I feel since I gave notice. I mean, I still sometimes feel the stress of knowing that I'll be here another 4 months, but I still feel SO MUCH BETTER than I did before.

Sometimes I even get to the point of feeling a little manic, which can sometimes be annoying to other people, and then I get mad at the annoyed person for being annoyed with me just because I am in a (really) good mood. So I'm feeling these UPS and DOWNS and UPS and DOWNS.

But I feel like I'm ready to conquer the world. Like I can do anything. How can I use this new found energy, this confidence, this motivation?

I'm afraid it won't be around long so I want to take advantage of it while I can.

Ideas?

A thief in the night

2009-10-30T12:19:00.003-04:00

In my last post, I wrote about how I had started wearing a mouth guard at night because of all the jaw clenching while I sleep.

Wednesday night, as I was getting into bed, I reached over to the night stand to grab the mouth guard and it wasn't there. I turned on the light to see if it had fallen to the floor. Nothing.

I went to the bathroom to see if I had left it there. Nope. Then the other bathroom. Nothing.

Then I started to figure out what happened.

I can't prove it, but I think that a certain dog, who isn't allowed in the bedroom but snuck in anyway, was intrigued by the smell of saliva and stole it.

There has been no evidence of a struggle but I suspect foul play.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, YOUNG LADY?!

2009-10-29T16:32:00.003-04:00

You know, around. (eye roll) Whatever.

Oh, wait, I forgot. I’m not 17 anymore.

Boy, howdy, am I not 17 anymore. (sigh)

So even though there hasn’t been much activity here, there’s been lots going on, though mostly in my head. Work has been SUPER stressful for me, and one day last week, I couldn’t leave work because I couldn’t stop crying long enough to leave my office and walk down to the car.

This weekend, I started using a night guard for my teeth, because the clenching was getting really bad, and Monday I had to leave work early because my head had been hurting for almost 24 hours. So I went home (and felt better immediately!) and spent some time talking to Jeff.

And we decided that it’s time. It’s time for me to leave my job, to tell my boss the truth, that this isn’t working out, and I’ll never be the CFO he wants me to be, I’m not CFO material, and that’s okay with me. We spent some time talking about what that would mean for us, since Jeff doesn’t have a job right now either, and how we felt about it. And then we went to therapy and talked about it some more.

We all agreed – it’s time.

So yesterday, I told my boss that I wanted to leave at the end of the year. It was a pretty good talk. I told him that I am too much of a people person to spend my life in a task-oriented job. It felt good to clear the air and be open in ways that I hadn’t been before. And seeing as how he had completely changed careers in his early thirties, he was very understanding. He put it very well: “You can’t blame a hippopotamus for not being a giraffe.” And it feels really good to no longer feel this constant fear of people finding out I’m not a giraffe. I’m not even close. I’m a freaking hippo!

In the end, we ended up pushing my last day back to the end of February, which will actually be good for Jeff and me. We’ll have income and benefits for a few more months, giving us even more time to find jobs. So I think that’ll work.

It’s funny: I’ve never given 4 months notice before. It sure does feel great.

LEAP OF FAITH, HERE I COME! YAHOO!

Sad story

2009-10-13T16:49:00.004-04:00

At my work, we send out birthday wishes to people who have been associated with us for a long time. Today in the mail, I received a letter from a wife: "Thank you for the warm birthday wishes for my husband, but he died in January. Please update your records."

Someone else returned a form we sent him with updated spousal information - "Died in March."

I began to imagine these senior citizens going through their last days without their life partners. Having to write notes like this.

And then I teared up a little.

Unequally yolked

2009-10-06T16:32:00.004-04:00

Jeff and I went to Dallas this weekend. We flew down on Friday, with a little bit of sitting around in airports mixed in.

I realized on the trip that Jeff and I don't travel well together. Jeff would probably be surprised to hear that. The thing is, when Jeff travels, he travels in solo mode, for the most part. Which means he sits and thinks and watches people and walks around and reads and jots little notes of the interesting things he is thinking. Notice I didn't say, "He talks for hours and hours with his lovely wife."

I've discovered that one of the things that makes me feel unloved is for Jeff not to talk to me. Not that he's "not talking to me" intentionally, like I sometimes do when I'm mad. He just happens to be not talking.

This weekend, I got really annoyed with him for reading his book. So I decided to ignore him. Then he decided to go for a walk. Which meant he left me with all of our luggage. So not only did he not even notice that I was ignoring him, but also he wasn't even there for me to ignore and I had to pee, but I was stuck with all the luggage. So then I was even madder.

And did the sight of his inexplicably annoyed wife make him want to go talk to her?

No.

But he did anyway, and then things were all better.

For My Information

2009-09-29T23:06:00.003-04:00

Yesterday, I mentioned some friends of ours who had a baby in the car with the assistance of their doula.

Let me tell, my mind was flooded with questions after that. Because me? I want to be a doula. I might have to do something like that someday. I mean, I know that those sorts of things are pretty uncommon, but they aren't the sort of things where you can stop and pull out your reference book and look it up real quick. You sorta have to know what to do.

Here are the things I learned and some other observations:

1. Call the midwife. The doula was on the phone with the midwife during the delivery, which must have been a huge help and comfort!

2. Police don't do police escorts like you see on TV. Instead, they call the paramedics. I feel like that's useful information.

3. Once her water broke, no one bothered trying to convince mom not to push. Even though they were in the car.

4. The birth went just fine. In the car. While it was moving. With the cord wrapped around her neck. Without medical intervention. I know that sometimes intervention is needed and sometimes it's wanted. Other times, things happen naturally. That's significant to me.

It's me. It's Monday.

2009-09-28T22:27:00.005-04:00

1. Have I mentioned that I like purple? I'm getting a little obsessive about. It's like I can't buy anything unless it's purple. Friday I went and got my hair cut. And dyed.

It's purple. It makes me happy. I also had to go buy some purple eyeshadow. Somebody stop me, please! It's obnoxious!

2. Some friends of ours had a baby on Friday. The labor went really fast and they ended up not making it to the hospital in time. She was born in the car!* And I'm REALLY happy that mom, dad and baby are all safe and sound after that wild ride! Also, I'm a big fan of holding babies.

Doesn't it look like I'm about to just slurp her right up? Yum!

3. I've been going to therapy for over two years. And can I just say that I love it? Cuz I do. I love it. I go every other Monday. And so every other Monday I just might include a shout out to my therapist for Thank God It's Monday. I'm a wholer and healthier person because of therapy.

4. It may sound cheesy, but I am thankful for drugs. Not the illegal kind, the OTC kind. Ibuprofen, more specifically. I woke up with a headache this morning, but a little Advil knocked it right out. Also, I'm thankful for Zantac almost every single day. Gah! Stupid stressful life! I mean, uh, yay for this life that is wonderful and filled with things for which to be thankful!

5. Suicide soup! My friend J and I went to Au Bon Pain and I couldn't decide which kind of soup I wanted. So I got all three. Mac and cheese on the bottom, broccoli and cheddar in the middle, and italian wedding on top. It was super yum. I may get it again tomorrow.

*Luckily, the father's cousin, who happens to be a doula, was with them in the car and helped deliver the baby. Did you hear that? A DOULA! Holy crap, I might have to rethink this whole doula thing.

Thankful that I can pretend it's still Monday

2009-09-22T00:24:00.000-04:00

Okay. Monday. Time to be thankful. For happy things.

Here go:

1. My tomato plants. Remember my tomato plants?

Here they are when I first planted them in their current container.

And here they are now!
I know it's really late in the season and I might not get any tomatoes from them and if I do, they'll prolly be gross, but I'm really proud that I grew these from seeds.

Also, I have a flower.

No tomatoes yet (or maybe ever), but I'm really happy about this flower.

2. Paint - the painting has not gone as well as I had hoped. We got some tinted primer, but it was really thin and it looked terrible the first time I primed.

But since I am trying to be happy about things, I'll say that I am thankful for second coats.

There. That's a little better.

3. Modern obstetrics - My bro and s-i-l are having a baby in February. I'm super grateful that there are doctors and nurses and midwives who can take care of pregnant ladies and their babies. And I'm glad to know that 'Lil Baby Tiny is doing great. See you in 20 weeks, 'Lil Baby Tiny!

4. The internet. It's strange, I know. But the internet can do some great things. Like help my friend's family find homes for dogs after an unexpected death. That's way cool.

5. Warm days - I know last week I said I was thankful for fall! What gives?! I like the fall weather, but I'm happy to be eased into it by having a few more warm, open-toed shoes days before the cold death of winter.

Facebook Fail

2009-09-21T11:56:00.002-04:00

Today, I tried to post the following status update on Facebook.

Please note the error I received...

Random

2009-09-15T17:45:00.003-04:00

Whenever I see a bus headed to PENNS LANDING, I usually misread the sign the first time and think that the second N is actually an I. Maybe they should do that in lower case.

I'm broken

2009-09-15T17:30:00.002-04:00

I don't know why I do this to myself. (sigh)

For reasons that would take a long time to explain, and not even adequately, I have issues with my phone. Serious issues.

Whenever I'm feeling the least bit stressed and am unable to juggle all the things that need to be juggled and have to drop something, the thing that gets dropped is the phone.

No, not literally.

But I stop answering the phone and, worse, I stop listening to my voicemails. It's bad enough when I do this with my personal phone, but when it's my work phone... man, that's bad.

Because the phone keeps ringing. And people keep leaving messages. And I keep ignoring them. And the sense of anxiety gets worse and worse every time the phone rings, because who is it? Is it important? How many times have you already called? Are you mad now? Am I gonna get yelled at? Are you the chair of that committee who wants to talk to me before I present a report about the committee to that other committee?

The more the phone rings, the more anxious I get and the longer it takes me get over my issues and just deal with the stinking phone.

Are there things you ignore when you are stressed?

Thank God It's Monday - again!

2009-09-14T22:31:00.003-04:00

Mondays ever get you down? Man, they do me. I start feeling it sometime Sunday afternoon, this vague sense of uneasiness about the coming week, and I wonder why Monday mornings seem more frequent than Friday afternoons.

Anyway, to help beat the Monday blues, it's time for another Thank God It's Monday, where I spend some time thinking about things that made me happy in the past week.

1. Summer Plum - I love purple. I own lots of purple things. My brush is purple, my comb is purple, so is my toothbrush, my hairdryer, my razor, my loofah, my current toenail polish. Love. It. Soon, my bedroom will be purple, too! Can't. Wait.

2. Fall color - the leaves are starting to change here in Philly. Growing up in Dallas, I never understood the fascination with fall foliage. 'Cause, you know, leaves are green and then they turn brown and then they fall off. Big deal. Oh, but it's different here. Beautiful shades of red and yellow and orange! So great! And it has started.

3. Pumpkin orange - Last May, Jeff and I went to the Penn Move Out Sale and I got a pumpkin orange corduroy jacket for $5. The cooler weather has given me a few chances to wear it and I love it. (If you ever see me wearing it, I'll probably tell you again that I got it for $5.)

4. Ambiance - I spent Thursday evening with my friend Julie. It was cool evening and we sat on her converted from porch and drank hot tea and talked. There was music in the background and the lights were dimmed. (Had I been with Jeff instead, it would have been romantic.) Just a lovely, relaxing time.

5. Late nights - I hope that someday Jeff and I have children. In the meantime, though, I sure am enjoying our no kids life. After leaving Julie's on Thursday, I met up with Jeff at another friend's house and played games for a few hours and came home after midnight. I don't know why, but it makes me feel young to be out and about in the middle of the night. (Don't ask me how I felt the next day.)

What about you? What good things happened to you this week?

Transition

2009-09-13T22:34:00.004-04:00

Almost three years ago, my life changed forever. I packed up all my things and said goodbye to friends and family and drove 1500 miles to a new city to marry a man I had met only months before.

It has been the most wonderful and thrilling ride of my life.

It has been the hardest thing I have ever done.

I'm not even sure I can tell you what it was like. It felt like I had lost myself. Everything about me was suddenly called into question. I had to reevaluate everything.

Part of the difficulty was all the things I ended up with, but didn't choose. I chose Jeff. I ended up with Philadelphia. I chose Jeff. I ended up with Circle of Hope. I chose Jeff. I ended up with a community around me that seemed full of aliens, and not the friendly kind either.

And quite honestly, choosing Jeff was hard enough. We think differently about money and debt. About kids. About possessions. About work. About housekeeping. It's been hard to sort that out. And doing it after taking myself out of everything that I had known and that was familiar and placing myself on what seemed like another planet was more than my mind could take.

There were times when I felt completely alone. I remember lying on the floor of my closet and crying out, "I'm dying, I'm dying."

The only way for me to survive was to change. And of course people change. I needed to. And I still had choices about who I was to become. But my options were different and I didn't like it.

I'm saying all this because I think I'm finally done. I've finally transitioned. I have decided who I will be, who I am. It's still a conscious struggle to be affected by my environment, but not defined by it - to be me, but here. I am no longer a Dallas girl living in Philadelphia. Now I am a Philadelphia girl. At least for now.

I don't know how long Jeff and I will stay. I'm not ready to give up entirely on the dream of going back to Texas someday.

But for now, Jeff and I are here. And I'm okay with that.

How firm a foundation, you saints of the Lord,
Is laid for your faith in His excellent Word!
What more can He say than to you He has said—
You, who unto Jesus for refuge have fled?

Fear not, I am with you, O be not dismayed!
For I am your God, and will still give you aid;
I’ll strengthen you, help you, and cause you to stand,
Upheld by My righteous, omnipotent hand.

When through the deep waters I call you to go,
The rivers of woe shall not you overflow;
For I will be with you, your troubles to bless,
And sanctify to you your deepest distress.

When through fiery trials your pathway shall lie,
My grace all sufficient shall be your supply;
The flame shall not hurt you: I only design
Your dross to consume, and your gold to refine.

The soul that on Jesus has leaned for repose
I will not, I will not desert to its foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavour to shake,
I’ll never, no never, no never forsake.

A tired dog is a submissive dog

2009-09-10T19:32:00.003-04:00

First of all, let me be clear - Jeff and I did not decide to go running with Autumn. We definitely learned our lesson last time.

But, we did go running with Autumn.

Let me explain!

Autumn has been freaky recently. Just really really excited/enthusiastic/boisterous recently. Driving us crazy.

So Monday, we decided to take her to the park so she could run around. When we got there, some people were having a cookout (it was Labor Day, after all) and we knew that if we let her off leash, she'd make a beeline for the nearest hot dog.

Bad idea.

So we went walking on the trails instead. We eventually got to a trail that led down right by the creek and there were people out there letting their dogs swim.

We've been positive for some time that Autumn is an awesome swimmer. As sure as you can be about a dog who has never been swimming. It's just that she's a strong dog and has these amazing webbed feet. And what do we have here? Some water! For dogs to swim in!

It took her a while to build up the courage to get in. She'd wade in a bit and then back up. But the other dogs were having too much fun and the tennis ball got thrown in the water one too many times and she finally went for it.

And she rocked.

We were right. I want to say that. WE WERE RIGHT. She's an amazing swimmer. And she loved it. When she'd go in to get the ball, she'd grab it and then look around for what else she could get. She'd see a leaf and swim over to it and tag it with her nose (she didn't usually eat them because she usually had the ball in her mouth) and then she'd swim over to something else.

And she swam and swam.

She finally decided she didn't want to swim anymore, she just wanted to eat the tennis ball, so she got out and sat down with the ball and started chewing. Also, she started shivering. It was only in the 70s so she got cold quick.

Rather than just let her chew and eat the ball, we decided to head back. She was SO GOOD on the walk. Tired dogs are awesome. Eventually I suggested that we see how she did running, since she was already pretty worn out and she did great. Also, since she still had the ball in her mouth, she wasn't too interested in eating anything else, which, as you'll recall, was part of the problem last time.

So that's the secret to going running with Autumn. Take her swimming for about half an hour first. And then put a ball in her mouth. She'll do great.

Thank God It's Monday

2009-09-07T23:02:00.008-04:00

Have you ever heard of Not Me Monday? If you read MckMama's blog, you probably have.

The premise behind Not Me Monday is to share all (some) of the embarrassing things you did in the past week, but you say it in such a way that sounds like you didn't actually do that because you are too classy and together and you would never wear your bathing suit bottoms as underwear because there was no clean laundry, thankyouverymuch.

And Not Me Monday is sometimes replaced by Not My Child Monday, where you talk about the things that your child most definitely did not do, like play with a toad for three hours, even though it died after two.

The thing about Not Me Monday, though, is that it's for people who live crazy, hectic lives, lives filled with children who make things crazy and hectic.

I am not one of those people. For me, Not Me Monday, would be boring and repetitive. Basically every week I would say, "I certainly did not sleep with my makeup on again. I take better care of my skin than that" and "I did not go 48 hours without a shower just because showering seemed like too much effort, and besides, it's Saturday, who am I going to see at Target?" and "I did not eat cereal for dinner again because there was no food in the house because I didn't go shopping because I had cereal in the house and I could just eat that instead of real food."

Of course, I could do Not My Dog Monday instead. But those would all sound the same too: "My dog did not try to help us clean up the back yard by eating her own poop" and "my dog did not try to bite Jeff because he thought Jeff was going to take away his toy" and "my dog does not leave so much dog hair lying around the house that it forms tumbleweeds, and if he did, I certainly would not let said tumbleweeds sit around for two weeks."

And all those things I didn't do, it wasn't because my life is crazy busy taking care of 14 children. It was just because. That's all. I got up, and got dressed and went to work and came home and ate cereal and watched TV and went to bed and didn't go shopping, didn't clean up the tumbleweeds, didn't take off my makeup (except tonight I did), etc.

So anyway, all of that to say, I think I came up with my own "Monday" idea.

TGIM - Thank God It's Monday - Because who would do that? I mean, Monday's are so... Munday.

Here's why:
1. I need a day devoted to thinking about good things, and not bad things and
2. TGIM helps me realize that how often good things come my way and
3. Mondays are just a part of the process. Mondays come and go, and good things are scattered along my life throughout.

Thank God.

So, welcome to the first ever Thank God It's Monday. Here are some things from this past week that I am thankful for.

1. I took pictures of flowers that look like this:

2. I sat in the cool grass and the warm sun (with my wonderful husband):

3. Autumn got tired (she went swimming!):

4. I sat by a waterfall (and smiled a fake smile):

5. I got eaten by some topiary:

6. When Jeff and I were talking about marriage and how it had changed us and if there was anything we lost that we'd like to get back, he quoted Blue Like Jazz and said, "...marriage is worth the trade. You lose all your freedom but you get this friend. This incredible friend."

I'm most thankful for that last one.

Not anything, really

2009-09-06T21:58:00.002-04:00

If this blog post were my friend, what would I say?

Probably... I would complain.

I would complain about how Autumn ate my strawberry plants today.

I would complain about what that one person said to my husband today that really highlighted one of the things about our church that bug me.

I would complain about being hormonal.

I would complain about how that one friend tried to help, but really just made me uncomfortable.

I would complain about that conversation I had with my husband yesterday that really got me down.

I would complain about not being able to fit into my pants.

I would complain about being a complainer.

I don't want to be a complainer. I want to see and expect good things in my life.

And who wants to read about complaining?

But this is what's real for me today.

Let's hope for better things tomorrow.

Maybe I'll work on a post of better things for tomorrow.

But for now, I'm off to bed. Tomorrow will at least start with a good night's rest.

I make myself laugh

2009-09-03T23:56:00.000-04:00

A conversation I had with my brother yesterday over IM:

brother: I have a $100 bet with cousin Cameron on who will get the better GPA this semester. He picks 2 classes...to go against my two classes.

me: haha

very nice

tell him he should come visit us?

i didn't need a ? at the end of that, did i?

brother: Did you?

me: no?

i don't think so?

i don't know?

brother: Do you want to play questions?

me: i hate questions?

brother: Are you asking me?

me: no, i'm telling you?

brother: who are you talking to?

me: i'm talking to you?

brother: stop it???????

me: i'm making me laugh?

brother: you're making me un-install google talk?

me: no?

Why do I do this to myself?

2009-09-02T23:16:00.003-04:00

I shouldn't read blogs written by people whose spouses have died.

There are lots of them, you know. And I guess it makes sense. Writing is probably very therapeutic.

But seriously, I shouldn't read them.

A few months ago, a friend told me about this blog. And through that blog, I discovered this blog. And then today, I found this one.

I spent probably 20 minutes at work reading and then I cried all the way home. I started thinking of what sort of blog entry I would write if something were to happen to Jeff and it was terrible. I cried and cried. All the way home.

Then I started feeling guilty for all the ways I'm not always the best spouse. When I'm not understanding enough, or when I'm selfish, or when I don't give him the benefit of the doubt.

It's hard to try to learn how to live with no regrets. And of course that doesn't mean never fighting with him or never asserting myself to get what I want. Those things are often necessary parts of marriage between two broken people.

But I wouldn't want to wish that we have laughed more or that we had made the time to go see that thing we always wanted to see or whatever.

Yeah, so anyway, if you're having too good of a day and you want to feel sad and maybe cry a little, go check out those blogs. And then maybe love your family a little better when you are done.

Dear God,

2009-08-31T22:26:00.005-04:00

I think you'll be happy to know that I am changing my mind about you. Hopefully to truer things.

I think I've stopped believing that I don't deserve to come to you in petition just because I don't pray often enough. And I don't praise you enough. And I don't thank you enough.

I think I've stopped believing that whatever you will do you will do, no matter if I ask for it. And I think I've stopped believing that you always do what is best for me, and that therefore with any request I may make, your only answer is knowing silence. Not that you don't do what is best for me, but that's the only way I can make out prayer being useful or effective. Surely the point of prayer isn't only learning reliance on you. Right?

I think I have stopped believing in hedging my bets. As in, please completely heal this situation. And if you don't do that, then please make it not so bad. And if you don't do that, please help me deal with it better. And if you don't do that, then thank you for getting me through it anyway.

I want to be bold. I want to say, "God, give me this. The end."

Which is strange, since I don't believe you will grant my request. But I ask it anyway. But I don't know why.

I'm falling for you

2009-08-30T23:11:00.000-04:00

I love fall. Love it. Love it more in Philly than I ever did in Texas. (Did I just say that? I'm so sorry, Texas, I didn't mean to. It's just, well, one thing led to another and the next thing I know, I sorta like Philly in the fall.)

I love the clothes of fall. I love the colors of fall. I love the cool brisk evenings of fall.

I love sleeping with the windows open and cuddling under the blankets.

I love kicking leaves up in the air as we walk the dogs.

It's not fall yet. But it's getting close. And I'm pretty excited.

In other news: I officially offered doula services to a pregnant mom at church. She knows I've never done it before, that I'm not certified, that I've never attended a birth, basically that all I know is what I have read in books and seen in The Business of Being Born.

But maybe I'll be better than no one?

She hasn't said yes yet, and it's fine if she doesn't. I've still taken the first step. And that's win!

More other news: My poor little dog Dylan has the itchies. I don't really know what he has, but about once a year, he starts itching. He ends up nibbling his entire belly just raw. So I have started to give him Benadryl twice a day. It helps with the itching but also makes him a little droopy. (It knocks me on my butt. Hard.)

A little more news: Did I mention I love fall? When it's fall, I'll get to wear my pumpkin orange corderoy jacket that I got at the Penn Move Out sale for $5. Yes, that's right, an orange, lined, corderoy jacket for $5. Yes, I'm bragging. But it's cuz I'm proud of it!

Last thing: Jeff and I decided we're going to celebrate Autumn (our dog) on her namesake day, the Autumnal Equinox! Scrabbled eggs for everyone! Woo!

A Poem About A Tragedy

2009-08-27T23:55:00.003-04:00

When I started my current job, I had to go clothes shopping. It had been about six years since I had a job that didn't allow me to wear jeans each and every day, even shorts if I wanted.

Not only did I have to buy new clothes, I also had to buy new shoes. I spent a LONG time looking at shoes. I went to Macy's and spent probably two hours trying on shoes, and walked away with only two pair of shoes that looked good and were comfortable. They were worth it.

Unfortunately, it's time for me to go shoe shopping again. You know why?

There once was a dog named Autumn.
She liked to eat poop from her bottom.
But if she could choose, she'd rather eat shoes,
And direct from my shoe rack, she's got'em.

Before Autumn

After Autumn

Before Autumn
After Autumn

I'm an American

2009-08-26T11:40:00.000-04:00

I have always wondered where I came from. I mean, you know, ancestors and all. That has always been really fascinating to me.

One time, I sat down at the computer and went to some website that would show the origins of various last names. I entered the ones I knew from my family and most of the names originated somewhere in the UK. I decided I was more United Kingdom than the Queen, what with all the royal inter-marrying.

When I moved to Philly, I discovered that there are people here who actually know which boat their great grandfather came over on. You see, on the east coast, you find a lot of third or fourth generation Americans. And there were groups of nationalities. Like in Philly, there's an Italian section of the city and an Irish section and a Russian section. So nationalities remained a part of people's identities.

In Texas, it seems like it took 3-4 generations for people to even make it to Texas, and then that was 3-4 generations before me. And you'd have people descending from Scots marrying people descending from Germans, because by this time, you're basically American, so you're not really all that different.

So anyway, yeah, there are people here who know their families history. And I was a little jealous. Because I didn't know where my ancestors came from.

And then you know what happened? You know what?

The internet got better.

The other day, my brother starting playing around with ancestry.com. It's crazy. They are starting to digitize all these public records and it's amazing all the stuff you can find. I looked at a scanned copy of the US census from 1920 that had my grandmother listed as an 11-yr-old. Isn't that crazy? And so then you can see her parents, because they are listed, too. And so you add them to your family tree. And then the website says, "Hey, that adult you just added, here they are as a kid, listed with their parents." So then you add them, and it goes on and on and on.

In one line, we've gone back 13 generations to 1635. And you know where they are from? Can you guess?

VIRGINIA!!!

I didn't want Virginia! I wanted Italy! Scotland! Wales! Not Virginia!

So I'm at least a 13th generation American, which actually, all romance aside, is pretty cool.

Signal to noise

2009-08-24T23:50:00.002-04:00

Dylan and I had class again tonight. I would like to talk more about it, but I haven't been sleeping well lately, and so I took a Benadryl to help me sleep. And that was about 45 minutes ago. And I can't tell if that drool on the bean bag chair is from me or from Autumn. I'm using her for a pillow right now.

Anyhoo, I remembered to take some pictures tonight of Dylan and his teacher.

I'm only sitting still because you have food in your hand. The one that you are holding off to the side that I am staring at. While you take a picture with the other hand. Yeah.

Okay, fine I'll play along. I'm sitting. See? Yeah, yeah,
I'm a good boy, blah blah blah. Food please.

Teacher: Dylan, sit.
Dylan: Sorry, I can't hear you, but I smell food in your hand.

Teacher: Dylan, watch me.

Dylan: AAAHH the noise! Stop with all the noise! Just food!

Can I ask you a personal question?

2009-08-23T23:00:00.002-04:00

In order to become a certified doula, I have to provide doula services at three different births and then get evaluations from the mothers, the doctors and the nurses.

Question: How do you talk someone into letting you be their doula when you aren't a certified doula?

Question: How do you provide doula services when you've never given birth and therefore have never even been at a live birth?

I'd kinda like to go to one just to watch (both to experience the birth and to watch a doula in action) but that seems weird to say to someone, "Hey, I know we hardly know each other, but can I come watch you give birth?"

Or, "Hey, I'm in training to be a doula. Will you be my guinea pig? It'll be free!"

In the meantime, I tried registering for a doula training class, but I haven't heard back from the trainer yet, so we'll see what happens.

This is getting realer and realer.

The Dog Wrangler

2009-08-21T19:21:00.002-04:00

Today I got off work early, which is a great start to a weekend. Jeff was home too so we decided to do a little running around and we ended up at Target where we ran into our friend Courtney.

Courtney basically rocks. She just completed a triathlon last weekend and she'd doing a 5K in a few weeks and then a half marathon later in the fall. So you could say that as Jeff and I plod along in our Couch to 5K training schedule, she's kind of our hero.

One of the things we talked about was the possibility of us taking Autumn (the energetic dog) out with us when we run. We decided that it would be a good idea for us to wait until we were more in shape and feeling more confident in our athletic abilities to start taking her with us, because she's kind of a handful.

Apparently, we also suffer from short term memory loss.

Because as soon as we got home, we decided to go running and to take Autumn with us.

What is wrong with us?

So we went inside, changed clothes, got the dog, and headed out. We drove down to Kelly Drive to run because there is a path along the river and it's really pretty and there are other runners out there.

But it was a new place for Autumn and she was super excited. There was just so much new stimulation and she would not calm down. Plus there were geese to chase. And green goose crap to eat. And oh my gosh why did we think this was going to be a good idea?

Jeff and I took turns wrangling Autumn as we ran and it was awful. I mean, we are clearly not skilled runners, but we also have this dog that wants to chase birds and eat poop and not run in a straight line very calmly at our sides. So we're having to keep from tripping on her and keep her from running other people off the path and keep her from eating poop WHICH WAS EVERYWHERE, and we just looked like the biggest oafs out there. Jeff wanted to throw her in the river. I wanted to throw myself in the river.

Eventually, she started to calm down a bit and did better at the end, but the damage was done. I had pulled a muscle in my chest and Jeff was in a bad mood.

Next run - no dog.

Eat local!

2009-08-20T21:51:00.003-04:00

I've never grown food before. I've always liked plants, but I've never grown food. Mostly because the food I liked to eat wasn't any sort of plant. Mom wouldn't let me raise cows. It's better that way.

So anyway, I've never grown food before. And I'm not sure that I am now, but at least I'm growing plants that might potentially one day make food.

A few months ago, I was checking out the Target $1 aisle. You know the one, right? The one with really cheap (as in, only $1) mostly useless items. Well, one day, I found food.

Well, seeds. Okay, fine, they were seeds. Actually it was more like a seed kit. There was a little package of seeds and a little dirt pellet (the one where you add water and then suddenly you have 8 times as much dirt as you thought) all in a little bitty pot. For $1.

So I decided to grow food.

I got two kinds: strawberries and tomatoes.

I planted each kind of seed and watered and waited. Eventually, the strawberry plants started growing, but they grew very slowly. Then the tomato seeds started to grow. And grow and grow.

Here's a picture of the kind of pot we started with:

I had six tomato plants growing and I eventually moved them to this:

The tomato plants kept growing and growing and growing. The strawberry plants, not so much.

Tonight, I moved the tomato plants to 5 gallon buckets:

Do you see the little bitty pot at the bottom? That's the one we started with!

After the tomato plants moved to the buckets, I moved the strawberry plants into the blue pot.

They don't look so good. Hopefully the new pot will be good for them and allow their roots to grow big and strong.

Okay, so now you've seen my plants. Now it's time for my confession: I have no idea what I am doing.

I talked to an employee up at Lowe's this weekend and learned more about my tomato plants. (side note: Every time I type "tomato," I accidentally type "tomator" and then I have to go fix it. EVERY TIME.)

What I learned:
1. My plants will probably die over the winter, even if I keep them inside.
2. If/When flowers bloom, I can just shake the plants and that should allow the girl parts and the boy parts to meet up and make little tomatoes. Don't ask me how.
3. My tomato plants should each be in a 5-gallon bucket. I have six plants. There was no way I was going to put each plant in its own bucket. I wouldn't have enough room in the house for them all. (I can't put them outside because I think Autumn would eat them. Actually, maybe I will put some outside. But later.)

So, as things progress, I'll keep you updated. And I might even give you some of my tomatoes, if I get any. Because I don't really like tomatoes.

Don't ask me why I'm growing them. All I know is that they were $1.

Sick day

2009-08-19T22:31:00.002-04:00

Some days I think to myself, "Man, I wish I was sick so I could stay home from work and get some things done."

Apparently I forget that when I am sick enough to stay home from work, it means I feel like crap. And all I want to do is lie around the house. And it's all I can do to muster the strength to go up the stairs to use the potty.

So I didn't get anything productive accomplished today, which seems appropriate, since I'm, you know, SICK.

But I did manage to watch three episodes of Gilmore Girls on dvd, and then secretly wish that I could be Lorelai Gilmore, and always look hot, and always have a closet full of red, blue and purple clothes, because that is what I look hottest in, and always be witty and funny and charming, even if not always... classy.

Piece of advice: when you are sick and are still in your pajamas and your hair looks crazy and you have no makeup on and you feel like crap, don't spend any time comparing yourself to the lead character on a fantasy/fairy tale for women. You'll end up feeling worse.

It's just I really like that show.

Dylan after the dentist

2009-08-19T00:01:00.007-04:00

I hate the dentist. Well, not the actual dentist. She was alright, I guess. But man, I sure hate going to the dentist. It's awful.

There was a newspaper article up in the dentist's office that says 49% of people would rather go to the dentist than do their taxes.

I am not one of those people.

When it was over, I was trying to explain to Jeff how traumatizing it was. Finally, he said, "At first I thought you were just being dramatic. Now I'm not sure."

"I'm about to cry," was my reply.

And of course today was dentist day for Lil' D as well. He finally had his broken tooth taken out. The last time he had a tooth out, he acted pretty drugged up for the rest of the day. But it was funny, because he still wanted to play. He would slowly walk over to his tennis ball, slowly pick it up, slowly bring it over to me, slowly set it down and then look at me with this drunk little face.

Today, he was pretty okay. He acted totally fine when we picked up him, although he did look a little droopy once we were in the car and settled for the ride home.

I have two fingers. I have four fingers.

Is this real life?

Is this gonna be forever?

He's so cute.

I wasn't supposed to feed him for about an hour in case the drugs made him sick, but he was hungry so he cried for an hour before I finally fed him. It was annoying, but after all the complaining I had done about having my teeth cleaned, I cut him some slack since they had done worse to him.

Although, he got drugs. I told Jeff I thought having your teeth cleaned was grounds enough for laughing gas. But I think it's a good idea I'm not in charge of making those sorts of decisions.

Why on earth did I cut my hair?

2009-08-17T22:53:00.002-04:00

Also, why did I take this picture of myself? I'm sitting on the toilet, smiling at myself in the mirror. Didn't I know this was supposed to be a private moment?

Doggy Basics 101

2009-08-17T22:24:00.002-04:00

Dylan had school today.

Well, I guess you could say I did, too.

Dylan is a such a smart dog, as herding dogs tend to be, and he gets bored without some stimulation. And frankly, I don't know how to keep a dog's mind active and not bored. So really this class is as much for me as it is for him.

And we're hoping that if we find ways to work his mind the way that walks work his body, he won't be so prone to growling at Jeff, which will be a good thing. Like they say, a tired dog is a submissive dog.

So tonight we worked on responding to his name (which he is already good at), and sitting and "watching me" and things like that. Dylan did pretty good. He is not only smart, but also very motivated by food. So that made for a productive evening.

When we got home, we showed Jeff the new things we had learned and then Jeff gave it a try, too. And even though Dylan doesn't like Jeff as much, he still did well with the commands. We'll keep working on these things throughout the week.

The only disappointment tonight was that I totally forgot to take any pictures. I made sure I took the camera and then didn't even think about it again until class was over and we were back in the car. Shoot!

Tomorrow, Dylan has his tooth removed. I won't forget to take pictures of that. :)

5K Potato

2009-08-16T22:36:00.002-04:00

Jeff and I are not active people. Some people really enjoy being active and sweating and they are good at sports and stuff. Those people aren't us.

But we've both been blessed with some pretty good genes and have managed to stay fairly slim without really working at it. But we both know that we'd be healthier if we were more active and our metabolisms are slowing down a little anyway. We're starting to feel our ages.

So, we decided to try out Couch to 5K. It's a running program that gets you from not being active at all to running 5K in 2 months. Tonight, we finished week one, which is pretty simple. You do a 5-minute warm-up walk, and then you alternate running for 60 seconds and walking for 90 seconds for a total of 20 minutes. It's really not too bad, although the heat we've been having has made it a little tougher.

The only problem I've run into so far is that we haven't been stretching any before or after and I'm starting to feel it. My hamstrings are starting to feel a little hamstrung.

Things just kept going wrong

2009-08-14T23:22:00.003-04:00

The other night, Jeff left the house to go to a friend's house. But then something went wrong.

His serpentine belt broke. He had to pull over and he tried to call me to tell me what happened. But then something went wrong.

My phone was dead so he couldn't reach me. Eventually, he was able to get in touch with a neighbor who came over and told me what happened. SoI got in the car and headed his way. In the meantime, he called the insurance company about sending out roadside assistance. He had pulled over in front of a big high-rise condo in downtown Philly and he asked the doorman for the address, which he gave to the insurance company, who called the tow truck. Jeff was told it would take about 45 minutes.

I showed up a little while later. I pulled my car up behind Jeff's and turned on my hazards. I sat out on the sidewalk with Jeff and let him be frustrated. And we waited. But then something went wrong.

After 50 minutes, the tow truck still wasn't there, so we called to see where the it was. Sorry, it'll be another 25 minutes. But then something went wrong.

Jeff noticed that the yellow blinking hazard lights were looking dimmer and dimmer. I tried to start my car to make sure everything was okay, but the battery was dead. D'oh! Good thing a tow truck was on its way.

In the meantime, Jeff remembered he had a Frisbee in the trunk of his car and we passed the time by tossing it back and forth. So that something went right.

After 30 more minutes, Jeff called the tow truck to see where he was. But something had gone wrong and we didn't even know it! The doorman had given Jeff the wrong address, so the tow truck driver was at a completely different location. Okay, so NOW it'll be 10 more minutes.

Jeff, standing in front of City Hall, talking to the tow truck driver.

But then something went wrong.

There was a car accident not too far away and the tow truck driver had gotten stuck in traffic. But he'll be there in two minutes!

So FINALLY the tow truck driver showed up (it was more than two minutes), jumped my car, and hooked up Jeff's car. We followed him up to our auto body guy in northeast Philly. Then we drove around for 10 minutes trying to find a place to get enough cash to pay the tow truck driver who only takes cash. Oh, and also, he had to charge us $3.50/mile instead of the $2/mile Jeff had been quoted because now it was night and prices go up at night. Never mind that it was night when Jeff called!

Eventually, things stopped going wrong and we got the car dropped off, the tow truck driver paid, and we made our way home, after 4.5 hours. And we went straight to bed.

Coincidence?

2009-08-13T12:05:00.002-04:00

The website for the US Government's Office of Personnel Management is www.opm.gov.

When I first saw it, I thought it stood for "other people's money."

Sometimes

2009-08-12T14:16:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I forget about lunch until it's too late. I'm already ravenous and unable to think straight.

Sometimes when that happens, I take the easy way out and order a pizza from Papa John's.

Sometimes when I order from Papa John's, I eat the entire pizza.

Guess what kind of day today was.

Guess who needs a nap now. And some bigger pants.

Playing

2009-08-11T22:44:00.004-04:00

Recently, I told Jeff I wanted Photoshop. I don't have just a fantastic camera, and it is several years old. I feel like the photos I take aren't all that great, and part of the problem is the camera (part of it is me), but I think I could pretty them up a little in Photoshop.

Turns out, Photoshop is kinda pricey. As in $800 pricey. So Jeff suggested that I look at GIMP, which is a free photo-editing software. (And we all know, "free" is his favorite price.)

So I downloaded GIMP tonight.

First of all, I have no idea what I am doing. I don't know what all the options mean, or even what all the words mean. It keeps talking about layers and I don't understand how to make different layers. Also, I have basically zero design sense, so I have a hard time figuring out if something looks good or not. I know how to make a photo look different. But does it look better?

Anyway I did some very basic playing around tonight. First, the original. You remember this photo, right?

Then I did this to it. I just edited the brightness and the contrast. (Yes, I know it was too much. My forehead has become its own light source.)

Then I colorized it. I don't really know what that means, so I can't explain it. I clicked "colorize" and this is what happened.

I actually think it looks kinda cool.

Finally, I oilified it. That's right, I said I "oilified" it. Apparently, this is supposed to make it look like an oil painting. There isn't that much difference between this photo and the second one, but there are a few distinctions.

Changing the contrast seemed to accentuate my moles (omg, did I just type that?) but the oilified image smooths them back out again. That's better in my book.

Why I am not going to post tonight

2009-08-11T00:08:00.002-04:00

Tonight did not go as planned. Well, there actually wasn't a hard and fast plan, but there were a few things that were sort of on the unofficial agenda for tonight.

That agenda did not include:
Jeff's car breaking down
My car breaking down
Extortionists pretending to be tow truck drivers
Playing frisbee in front of City Hall

Let's just say things didn't go as planned.

But, I promise that in the next few days there will be an update on the Miscellaneous Tea and another on tonight's exciting adventures.

In the meantime, good night and good luck.

I was gone all weekend

2009-08-09T23:39:00.000-04:00

Weekend texts to my husband with no context:

4:25 pm 8/7/09
Wish I had my phone set up to twitter. I would have twittered about burning my tongue on hot chocolate.

6:49 pm 8/7/09
On ground in Atlanta.

7:30 pm 8/7/09
I forgot that in the south there are perfect looking women.

8:01 pm 8/7/09
The southern accent. A sound for sore ears.

9:35 pm 8/7/09
On the ground in b ham. Now on to living ston.

Again? Already?

2009-08-07T00:44:00.000-04:00

Today is our Meetiversary!

Jeff and I met three years ago today.

You can read the store here. (Remember, it's a blog, so read it from the bottom up.)

I also mentioned it here.

Updates

2009-08-06T00:34:00.003-04:00

Dylan - Jeff took Dylan to the vet today to have his tooth looked at. Guess who's gonna get some money from the tooth fairy! Sometime next week we'll take him in to have the broken tooth removed.

Dylan had a tooth removed about three years ago. Here's how he looked after those drugs:

It'll be a fun day. :)

Stellan - First of all, I am not a MckMama hater. I don't think Stellan's heart problems are made up or that the whole thing is a fraud. So if that's why you are here, beat it.

Okay, now that that's out of the way.

Last week, Stellan was NOT doing well. They were making plans to take him to Boston for another ablation. But there were so many things to work out! Insurance, scheduling the air ambulance, making sure there was a bed for him in Boston... all these things took time. In the meantime, they kept trying various drug combinations to get Stellan's SVT under control.

And guess what. They found something that worked. It actually worked. As in, Stellan didn't have SVT for days. And they decided that he was doing so well, they'd just let him keep taking drugs. And go home. The new drugs haven't made him toxic and he's feeling much better. So, whew!

So... what's new with you?

It's picture day!

2009-08-05T23:23:00.004-04:00

I got new glasses this weekend. What do you think?

Just kidding. I didn't get these. Also, what is up with my hair?

I got these instead. You can't really tell in the pics, but the frames are green. I haven't totally decided what I think of them. Jeff says he likes them and that girls in glasses are hot. I can't decide. When I went to work in them yesterday, I felt like I was in junior high going to school for the first time with glasses. I wondered if anyone would say anything. I wondered if I'd be able to tell if they liked them or not based on how they acted when they said, "Oh, they look great." Are you just being polite? Do I really look like a big dork and I just don't know it?

I think maybe they look alright.

Here is a picture of Autumn standing around watching us make dinner.

I thought she looked small in the picture so I decided to take another one with me in it for perspective.

Then Autumn decided to be real cute and lay her head on Jeff's lap while he ate dinner.

I sure do like her. Even though she sometimes eats poop. And then sometimes throws it up on the carpet.

Chance Encounter

2009-08-04T23:20:00.003-04:00

What do you do when you see someone famous? I haven't run into famous people very often and I'm never sure what to do. I hate to stare or go talk to them like you are friends or anything. Is it okay to speak? Is it okay to tell them you like their work? Is it okay to ask to have your picture taken with them?

Seems like famous people might sometimes like to be treated like normal people.

Maybe it depends on the location. Like if Tom Hanks is sitting down at a restaurant with his family, perhaps it's better to leave him alone.

But if Teller is walking around in the Atlantic City hotel where is he performing that night, maybe you could say something to him. He probably won't say anything back.

Or if, say, Charles Barkley is walking around in Target, maybe you could ask him for a picture. I'm not sure though.

So when I passed him and he asked me how I was doing, I just said I was fine.

It seemed like that was okay.

So cliché

2009-08-03T21:59:00.004-04:00

I shouldn't be allowed to write blog posts the first day or two of my period. It's pathetic.

Tonight I tried to sit down and blog. I had a few ideas, but then as I was thinking about them, I thought they sounded boring. I know that sometimes you can make boring things sound interesting if you can write about them interestingly, but I was feeling... well, boring and inadequate and like a failure.

See what I mean? I shouldn't be writing tonight.

Because then, Dylan jumped up on the couch with me and started snuggling. And then I started crying because I am a bad owner and I don't spend enough time with him and I don't interact with him enough and he's got some issues and because of Cesar Milan, I know that I am the reason for those issues, and it's all my fault. And I just cried and pet him and told him that I loved him.

And then we went upstairs and played fetch a little even though he gets fixated when we play fetch which Cesar Milan has said is a bad thing, but I felt guilty and I know he likes fetch, so I played with him.

And then I noticed that there was a little blood on the tennis ball so I looked at his teeth and I saw one tooth that was bleeding a little, and another tooth that looks like maybe it's broken and had a major receding gum line.

And I'm a bad owner because I didn't even know about it.

And what kind of person could possibly be a bad owner to this little guy?

Me, that's who. I'm crying again.

Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow.

On being a doula

2009-08-02T00:41:00.003-04:00

One of the things about being a doula is that not only do you have to actually do the work, but also you have to find the work. You have to find clients. And right now, I think that involves two things:

1. Educating men and women about the effect of having a doula on childbirth.
2. Advertising yourself as a doula.

I think Philadelphia is pretty doula-knowledgeable, at least in the circles that I run. The church that I attend isn't very big, but has several doulas. So people seem to be aware of what doulas are and what they do. In Dallas, I don't feel like that was the case. The labor and delivery "culture," if you will, was more accepting of a medicalized birth where you just did what the doctor said to do, and often planned a c-section for convenience sake.

(NOTE: I am not, or at least not intentionally, criticizing the planned c-section. The pregant woman is the only one who can make the decision about what type of labor and delivery is best for her and her baby, provided she is fully informed about the ramifications of her decisions.)

So, all that to say, part of what I want to do is the educational aspect of "this is what a doula is, this is what she does, and this is how she helps."

Anyway, I've heard that doula work is pretty competitive. And I don't think it is because there are too many doulas, but rather that not enough people are using them because they don't know they need one.

Luckily, I am not the only one spreading the word about doulas.

I read Heather B. Armstrong's blog. You may know her as Dooce. Heather recently gave birth to her second child, Marlo. Her first delivery was augmented/managed, but with Marlo, she decided to go natural and she hired a doula.

Okay, so big deal. Someone had a baby and hired a doula and didn't use drugs. Big deal.

Except that Heather is actually kinda a big deal.

Thanks, Heather, for spreading the word.

Forget I said that

2009-07-30T23:29:00.005-04:00

It's tough being an extrovert. I mean, you know, life can be hard. Sometimes there just aren't any people around and you have to be alone. Like, by yourself. With no one to talk to. And it sucks.

My life is hard today. I work basically by myself, and I drive home by myself, and then tonight my husband (the introvert, the one who likes to be alone) had somewhere to be. He's playing D&D with the guys. And yes, I could have gone. But it's not so much fun to watch other people play a game.

And so I stayed home by myself and moped. Poor me.

I was forced, forced I tell you, to watch Private Practice on TV and to play fetch with the dog (the one who actually understands fetch, not the one would rather play "fetch once and then eat the ball," or socks, in this case.)

And it was absolutely necessary for me to blog about my poor little life and to use sentences that contain a conjunction, quotation marks, parenthesis, and commas to make the sentence more complicated than anyone cares to read.

And now I hear a weird sound outside. I hope these aren't the last words I'll ever type before someone breaks in and kills me dead. I wouldn't be worried except I'm here alone. Maybe I shouldn't put that on the internet - that I'm here alone.

Let this be a warning to all you would-be murderers - I have two very fierce (looking) dogs that would love to scare the crap out of you with their barks and then lick you to death.

Also, my big bad husband just came home and he'll totally kill you if you kill me first. On that note, I gotta go spend time with my hubby.

Later!

My dog is a turkey

2009-07-29T23:25:00.010-04:00

Are my taste buds growing up or are they* getting better at turkey bacon?

I remember my first experience with turkey bacon. I was at my aunt's house in Bryan, TX, and I remember feeling as if turkey bacon was the "adult bacon."

And I didn't want to grow up.

But I did.

And so now I eat turkey bacon, and honestly, it isn't that bad.

I got home from cell group tonight and I was pretty hungry. Since Jeff wasn't home and I didn't have to think about what he wanted for dinner, I decided to have bacon and eggs. I ended up cooking more than I could eat, so I shared the bacon with the dogs. I think it was Autumn's first experience with bacon.

I think she liked it. Why do I think that? First of all, she's a dog and it's bacon. But also, I caught her eating the paper towel that I used to soak up turkey bacon grease.

It wasn't the first thing she destroyed today. This is the email I got from Jeff earlier today:

"Autumn ate the egg crate foam in the guest room. (She didn't really eat it [I hope], she just tore it up.) I didn't get a picture for you. Sorry."

That's okay, I took my own picture.

She looks like she's feeling guilty here, but really she's just mad that I'm making her sit and stay when what she really wants to do is continue eating egg crate foam.

*By "they" I mean the turkey bacon makers, not my taste buds. That wouldn't make any sense.

Not a good day

2009-07-28T22:28:00.004-04:00

Today was an extremely frustrating day at work.

The short version - our audit is next week.

The long version - the long version is boring. I'm not going to tell you.

But it was really frustrating. Grrrrr. So Jeff and I borrowed my bro and sis-in-law's blender and made frozen strawberry margaritas and watched The Bachelorette. (And now he's making cheese and crackers. Which is good because now I have heartburn.)

But I'll leave with this:

In my doula books, I've learned about a thing called placenta previa, which is when the placenta is attached to the uterine wall close to or covering the cervix. I won't play doctor today and tell you whether or not it's a big deal and what can be done about it. If you want to know, click the link.

Anyway, yesterday, I was stopped at a red light behind a Toyota Previa. What a strange name for a car!

Stellan and SVT

2009-07-27T19:32:00.006-04:00

Have you heard about Stellan? If you are a blog surfer like me, maybe you have.

Stellan (aka MckMuffin) is the 9-month old son of Jennifer McKinney (aka MckMama,) blogging author of www.MyCharmingKids.net.

Stellan has an unusually bad case of the relatively common condition called SVT, or supraventricular tachycardia.

Lots of people have SVT. I've suffered from it a bit myself. But most SVT is managed fairly effectively with beta blockers. That's what helped me. It actually has several different causes and several different manifestations, which you can read about here. For me, stress and birth control pills caused my SVT to get worse, which led to me taking beta blockers. Most of the time, my SVT doesn't require drugs at all.

Stellan's SVT is bad. His heart doesn't work properly AT ALL unless he's on beta blockers. Unfortunately, his body starts adjusting to the drugs and he requires higher and higher doses, risking his body becoming toxic. Recently, his doctors felt like he had maxed out on his current drug regimen and wanted to try something new. Something new HAS NOT WORKED AT ALL.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What is SVT?

Tachycardia is, in short, a rapid heart beat. It can have various causes like hormone imbalances, stress, fever, blood loss, etc.

On your heart, there are certain receptors that receive electical impulses from the brain that tell the heart to beat. There's the SA node and the AV node. These typically work together to create a coordinated heartbeat. Sometimes, there is another spot on the heart that is telling the heart to beat. But this creates uncoordinated, and ineffective, heartbeats.

Ventricular tachycardia is when this extra impulse originates in the heart's ventricles.

Supraventricular tachycardia (SVT) is when the extra impulse originates from anywhere else. Sometimes this leads to a rapid heartbeat. Other times, the heart sort of flutters, where it rushes a beat and then pauses, and then starts beating normally again. (I experience both.)

Breaking out of SVT

If a heart stays in SVT for too long, there are three ways to convert a heart out of SVT:
1. Vagal manuevers - holding your breath and bearing down like you are trying to poop, holding your breath for a few seconds, coughing, plunging your face into cold water, drinking a glass of ice cold water, and standing on your head.

2. Drugs - not sure how these work, but at least one of them causes the heart to stop momentarily, in the hopes that when it starts again, it'll be in normal sinus rhythm.

3. Electrical cardioversion - the delivery of a therapeutic dose of electrical impulses at a specific moment in the cardiac cycle.

Why is SVT bad?

Prolonged SVT is hard on the body, as Stellan is experiencing now. First of all, it's hard on your heart. Your heart actually rests between beats and can get worn out quickly if it isn't getting adequate rest. Also, if your heart isn't beating effectively, all the other parts of your body aren't getting oxygenated blood to function.

Stellan's kidneys have stopped functioning since they aren't being nourished. His core body temperature is below 95 degrees. His is lethargic, and sorta pasty. But he's alive.

What next?

Sometimes, drugs just don't work in converting the heart out of SVT into normal heart rhythm and an ablation is performed. An ablation is when a catheter is inserted into the heart and zaps/fries/lasers the portion of the heart that is sending out the faulty signal to the heart. Ablations on adults are pretty safe.

Ablations on children are not. Stellan and his heart are still so small. An ablation will likely also kill his functioning AV node, which means that his heart will not beat on its own at all and he will be dependant on a pacemaker for the rest of his life. The plan had always been to manage Stellan's SVT until he was about 4 years old before they did the ablation. He heart would be large enough to handle the ablation without issues.

Stellan will probably not make it that long. So the McKinney family is headed to Boston for the ablation and a pacemaker. But at least he'll be alive.

You can read more here.

I am not a doctor. Some of this information may not be exactly correct. But you get the gist of it.

Oh, I'm sorry. Did you not want my business?

2009-07-26T21:59:00.005-04:00

Have you ever tried to use your credit card only to be told that there was a minimum purchase amount for credit card transactions?

Isn't that really annoying? I mean, do they accept credit cards or do they NOT accept credit cards? I love it when they say, "There's an ATM right over there." Yeah, and YOUR bank and MY bank are going to collectively charge me $4.50 to get out some cash, which means I'll spend more money than your so-called minimum.

Recently, however, I have managed to talk them out of charging me the minimum. You know why? BECAUSE THEY CAN'T.

It goes something like this:

Them: Your total is $8.73.

I had them my card.

Them: There is a $10 minimum for credit card purchases.

Me: Did you know that's in violation of the terms of your contract with Visa?

Them: Uh.

Of course they didn't know. They aren't the boss. They didn't make the rules.

Them: Okay, I'll go ahead and run it.

Me, feeling bad that I bullied someone so I could get my way: Look, I know why you do it. It's because Visa charges you a lot of money.

Them: Yeah, it's a lot of money.

Me: So the problem is Visa. THEY'RE the evil one. Small businesses should band together and fight Visa.

Them smiles.

Me: And you could lead the way! You could become like a consultant or something to teach companies how to deal with Visa, and people would see you and say, "Hey, that's the guy that fought Visa!"

Them, with more smiles: It only takes one to change the world.

Me: Exactly. It might as well be you.

THE END.

This is a not-exactly-word-for-word transcript of the conversation I had with the guy at a pizza place in the mall yesterday. And I like it for two reasons.

1. I only paid $9.55 for my lunch instead of $10. Yes, we had that showdown over 45¢. My husband was so proud.
2. Them was smiling by the end. I didn't want to bully him. Really. I tried to make sure he knew my problem was with Visa and partially with the owner of the restaurant, but not with him. I think I succeeded.

Jeff and I then sat down to eat our lunches, all the while trying to figure out ways to get Visa not to be so evil. The thing is, it's not that I want Visa not to make any money. I appreciate the service they provide. I'm okay with a company making money of the convenience they provide me. I just don't like it when the RIP PEOPLE OFF.

Having been in what I would call "extreme credit card debt" I was already convinced of the usurious ways of credit card companies. I know, yes, I have responsibility in how I use money and credit, but I was in college and I was stupid and THEY KNEW IT AND THEY PREYED UPON ME. (I am currently credit card debt free, praise God.)

But now as a business professional (what? me? I'm barely a functioning adult. Who let me do this, and why can't they see I'm a fraud?) I see the OTHER side of the digital coin. Credit card companies charge vendors, too. Big companies can eat these costs, but small business suffer. And they have to pass the cost on to me. And you know what? That's fine. Raise your prices to cover these costs. If I know how much I'm spending when I walk into this, that's fine. But to tell me at the end of our business transaction that I haven't spent enough money, which tells me you don't want my $9.55, you only want my $10, that's just not a great customer experience. I mean, I have money. Money, that I want to give to you in exchange for the thing I want and at a price advertized by you on your menu, and therefore implicitly agreed upon. For you to say, "Nah, that's okay," results in the furrowing of my brow and the pursing of my lips and the raising of one eyebrow.

Jeff and I decided we'd need more than half an hour to figure out a battle plan for defeating the oligopoly that is Visa, Mastercard, Discover and AmEx. In the meantime, I may decide to support my local small business and start carrying cash. (I wish you knew me well enough to know that the last statement should actually be enough to make you faint and fall over.)

I like it this way

2009-07-26T00:08:00.004-04:00

One of my goals for this blog (rather than the last blog) is that I post every day. Well, I mean, I'll have a little bit of grace for myself when I don't post (like when I was at the beach last weekend,) but "It's already after midnight" isn't a good enough reason not to post. Too bad. Suck it up. Post anyway.

Perhaps some of my writing has suffered from the late nights. But this is a good discipline for me, so I have decided that to post is better than not to post.

Anyway, blogging regularly has had an unintended consequence and it's actually kinda nice. You see, there are days when I had a crappy day at work and all I want to do is come home and sit in front of the TV for a few hours and go to bed. And sometimes I'll do just that.

But blogging regularly has encouraged me to go out and do stuff. To let things happen to me. So that I'll have something to write about.

I don't get a blog post out of it every time. But that's okay. This is still a better life.

And so I leave you with this - a picture of me getting my face licked by a one-eyed dog.